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Anal Sex by yourself or with a partner.
Most people don't realize that anal intercourse is the least
practiced form of anal play; when stimulation with fingers, toys,
and tongues is far more common, partly because the prostate, the
rectum, and the rim of the anus are all rich sources of nerve
endings. Gentle stimulation of these areas can be very pleasurable,
as long as you are comfortable with your body and prepared for the
experience. The very idea of anal sex is arousing to many, and this
form of erotic pleasure is expanding the sexual repertoire of a
growing number of lovers. Still considered somewhat socially taboo,
it can add excitement, spice, and a feeling of naughty play. Some
couples reserve it for special occasions.
Once you are alone or with a partner and comfortable with the
idea; ready to explore. Start slowly. Try different kinds of
lubrications and find one you like. Then start with gentle touching.
If you feel uncomfortable or tense, stop for a few minutes and try
to relax until you're ready to experiment further. Many people enjoy
having a finger slowly inserted into their anus (both men and
women). You or your partner might try twirling his or her finger
just inside the sphincter muscles, or use a gentle shunting motion
in and out of the anus. They also sell finger condoms for those
interested. You might want to progress to experimentation with
dildos and other anal toys. Always use lots of lubrication and never
insert anything into your anus that doesn't have a flared end.
Sanitation. Anal sex can be relatively clean. It is a useful
idea to have had a bowel movement recently. Some people choose to
use enema’s several hours before engaging in this activity. You can
buy disposable individual enema’s that are easy to use. Although, it
is not recommended to use enema’s on a regular basis as it flushes
away necessary bacteria. A very important element to remember during
anal sex is the possibility of cross-contamination.
Never go from the anus to the
vagina, either with fingers, toys, or penis. You run the risk of
transferring bacteria. Use a condom. Never go from anus to mouth, or
anus to vagina, without washing carefully (and changing condoms) in
between. This should be an enjoyable experience. If it is not, stop.
Lubrication The rectum is not like the vagina in that it
produces any natural lubrication when stimulated. It needs specific
lubricant, and the more the merrier. The type of lubricant is very
important. Water-soluble lubes work well with condoms and are
soothing and slippery. They usually require repeated applications
during sex.
Popular brands include Astroglide and KY-Jelly. But, oil-based
lubes, such as petroleum jelly, quickly cause condoms to degrade.
They also coat the inside of the rectum, creating a breeding grounds
for germs. The rectum does contain bacteria and thus a very slight
possibility of urinary tract infection for the man (though the woman
generally stands at greater risk). Condoms can help with that
situation and many choose them every time with anal sex, though the
majority of people report no problems going bare. Also, urinating
after sex (both of you) is a good way to help prevent infection.
Additionally, you should always avoid
any anal sex lubricant that has a desensitizing agent. Pain is a
body's way of announcing that something is wrong. Without that
awareness, you could accidentally be harming the receiving partner
and neither of you would realize it until much later.
Anal Toys. Using toys can be a perfect
way to start out slow, by yourself or with a partner. There are
lot's of fun toys available to play with. Check out the
anal toy section in our Allure Erotic Toy Store for lots of
ideas. Different sizes, lovely colors, butt plugs, anal beads,
vibrating anal toys, plus don't forget the lubrication! If it is a
first experience starting out with smaller sizes is best, just to
get the feel, then working up in size as you are comfortable.
Sometimes just a buzzing vibration near the anus can be stimulating
without actual insertion to begin with.
Anal sex can be enjoyed in various forms by both men and women
of all sexual orientations. If you're afraid to broach the subject
with your partner, you're not alone. Many people don't find the
courage to experiment with anal play until well into their sexual
lives. However, you might consider taking a deep breath and blurting
out your interest in anal play. Who knows? Your partner may have
been secretly longing to tell you of his or her own interest! At
best, you'll discover a new experience that will stimulate and
enrich your sex life. You may also find that you just don't care for
anal sex. That's fine too. Anal sex isn't for everyone! But, at
least trying can often times lead you into new realms. So try it
with a partner or even alone for more relaxed first time comfort and
see if you like it. If you do find that you like anal play, consider
adding some butt plugs, beads, or vibrating anal toys to your
pleasure chest. Toys can add a distinctive touch to your anal
pleasures!
Anal Intercourse. Many men and women are curious about anal sex
but are scared about comfort and safety issues. If you are curious,
the following steps will help you. The anus has no natural
lubrication, so you'll need to use plenty of lubricant. Relax and go
slow. Encourage the receiving partner to take deep breaths and
communicate their feelings aloud. Start with external stimulation
from something small, like a finger or a small vibrating toy. Once
the receiving partner has relaxed and begun to feel aroused, insert
the finger or toy gently into the anus, letting the anal sphincter
accommodate the object. Gently move the object in a shallow circular
motion. The two rims of the sphincter are filled with nerve endings,
so this small motion should feel good. If it doesn't, stop or try
something different.
When you are both ready to move onto
something larger, consider using a dildo or vibrator first. This
allows you greater control and may make things easier for the
receiving partner. Once you are ready to introduce a penis into the
anal play, slow down and proceed with caution. Many men find anal
sex incredibly stimulating, for physical and psychological reasons.
Ejaculation may occur sooner than usual. Allow the receiving partner
to set the depth and pace. Breathe and concentrate on relaxing your
anus. Keep communicating. Stop immediately if there is discomfort or
if either partner says he or she wants to stop. Don't neglect
stimulation of other parts of the body. Clitoral or penis
stimulation combined with anal play can be exciting.
Positions. Placement. There are many ways to approach this but a
safe idea would be traditional comfort and reliability. A few old
standards for the first time include:
1) The man lays on his back while the woman straddles his groin,
facing him. In this way she can guide the speed, depth, and angle of
penetration (she should be careful not to tighten her pelvic muscles
as she sits astride). This gives the perfect opportunity to him to
pleasure her breasts, her clitoris, and to watch her face as she
climaxes.
2) The woman lays on her back with a pillow under her bottom. Her
legs are spread and her knees are inward toward her shoulders, up
high. As before, the man can pleasure her breasts, her clitoris, and
watch her climax in this position
3) In the typical scissors position, the woman lies on her side with
her legs spread and the man lays behind her, entering her from the
rear. It is a perfect position for his hands to stimulate her
breasts and his mouth to nuzzle her neck.
4)The rear-entry or doggie style, the woman is on her hands and
knees, head down (perhaps on a pillow) ass up high, while the man
kneels his body behind her. Either the man or the woman can also
stimulate her clitoris in this position.
Some Individual Customer advice and reviews:
* *
* * * * Yes butt plugs do help enormously...even after wearing a
plug for 15 to 20 minutes there is a definite advantage in a relaxed
sphincter muscle. Enema first...15-20 minute butt plug
training...sexual stimulation before being taken anally and the
possibility of a good experience increases ten fold. You will be
amazed at the difference in the butt plug sizes from small to
medium...it is huge if you are buying the better plugs. Many people
never do attain the ability to use the large plugs. Good news. Butt
plugs will loosen you up and help you prepare for the sex gift. Move
from small, medium, large and the big event should go ok. Try
leaving the plugs in for 20 to 30 minutes at least. You might want
to use the largest plug on the day you give the gift so you with be
relaxed (or a least used to it).
Bad news. Loosening the muscle will
probably be uncomfortable. I prefer the jelly kind to the beads on a
string because they are much easier to keep clean. "Jelly" is the
term that is given to a substance that is soft and pliable. Some
items made of this "jelly" substance are very soft, others are more
rigid.
* *
* * * * In anal beads, typically you would have a series of hard
plastic balls joined together by a string or cord. (Which you hoped
would not break as they were being pulled out!) With the "jelly"
anal beads, the balls are made of this "jelly" substance, but they
are also joined together by the same substance. They are stronger,
more durable, and, as mentioned above, far easier to keep clean.
The sensation is different in that
with the "typical" hard plastic anal beads, they would sort of
"bunch up" once they were inserted. With the "jelly" anal beads,
because the "jelly" substance is more rigid than string or cord, the
beads enter the rectum as a stiffer piece. Most are about 12" inches
long, and it depends on how much a person can tolerate. The feeling
is one of being filled, but also feeling the beads going more deeply
into the body. The sensation of them being pulled out, past the
sphincter muscles, is the same, however.
* *
* * * *The dual eggs with the single controller are very easy to
clean... besides we tend to use condoms on our anal toys to help
keep them clean. Also you might want to think about a remote control
anal toy... If I had it to do over again... I think that is what I
would buy... We have a remote control egg and we both love it...
* *
* * * * I'd vote for Maximus or Slippery Stuff, KY seems stickier
and Astroglide dries out too fast. Plus, Maximus comes in a large
size and with a name like that you know its target audience.
Astroglide is a fine general-purpose lube, but like many other
people, I find that it dries out a bit too quickly. It is also
pretty thin, and I much prefer a thicker, gel-type lube for anal
play.
Water-based lubes are the all-around
safest type of lube to use. They are compatible with all types of
condoms and toys, are readily available at both the pharmacy and
adult shops, and are fairly inexpensive.
Silicon-based lubes are especially
nice since they don't dry out, but they can break down silicon-based
toys and are more expensive than water-based lubes. They are
compatible with all types of condoms.
Oil-based lubes are the easiest to
find and generally the cheapest. Vegetable oil, olive oil, baby oil,
take your pick. The problem is that they will break down any form of
rubber or latex-- both condoms and toys. Never use an oil-based lube
with a condom, and be aware that your rubber butt plug/dildo may be
damaged. An exception might be the newer polyurethane condoms, most
commonly found under the Avanti name.
One other warning with oil-based
lubes-- don't get them up inside a woman's vagina. The oil
interferes with the vagina's ability to clean itself and may rapidly
lead to yeast infections or other nasty problems.
That said, oil can be a LOT of fun.
It doesn't dry out and is very slippery . If you just want to give a
massage or wrestle around, go for it! I'm not aware of any problems
using oils anally, either, except that I understand they make the
squirts afterwards a bit worse than water- and silicon-based lubes.
Surprise, surprise - I have not been able to get the material safety
data sheets on silicone based lubes. Not for any of them. But I
studied pharmacological toxicology for years, and there is no way
you're ever gonna get me to use silicone based anything on or
in my body.
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